UnNamed Dave Part 6 – Company Big Team Meeting

Dave was working.  He was at his desk.  He was calling and emailing.  He was focused.  He had got his coffee from the coffee machine.  He had walked from the machine back to his desk.  He pointed at his friend along the way.  He had sat down at his desk and after about 5 minutes he got his mind back into the “flow” of work.

It was 2:30PM in the afternoon.  It was a slower part of the day.  Some of his fellow employees were working frantically to try to improve their numbers in order to hit their metric with the sole and only goal of not being harassed or pointed out by their manager.  You would think an organization would be more focused on meaningful work but alas the organization known as ComboTech was only truly interested in the appearance of productivity.

The Sales Director made an appearance.  He had left his office and was moving around.  People looked at him but made sure to look at their screens and give the appearance that they were working very hard.  They knew deep inside that he thought they were “lazy” and that the company was not doing well due to their laziness (it could not be a lack of leadership).

People were standing up from their cubes and moving towards the coffee machine area.  Dave was a little suspicious but he had seen cookies earlier.

As his coworkers stood up, he glanced at them and they also looked at him.  There was nervousness in the air.  The company morale was down.

Dave walked next to his friend Jeff.

As the workforce moved towards the cookies the Sales Director said “Everybody grab a cookie.”  His words were always kind of slurred for some odd reason.

Dave moved close to Jeff and whispered, “It was nice knowing you.  I guess this is the end for all of us.”

Jeff smiled and looked back at Dave, “See you on the unemployment line.”

The Sales Director looked around, “Alright everybody got a cookie?  Okay.  Into this room.”

The workforce moved as one, unsure if it would be their demise.

-End of Entry, DJ ROBO BISCUIT

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UnNamed Dave Part 5 – The Meeting

Dave entered the meeting room.

His teammates were there.  Dave was happy for a break from his work and staring at his screen.    His mind will enjoy a break in the meeting but he will still have to show discipline.

Dave is not excited to hear Max Power.  Max Power is a coked out douchebag sales trainer who the team has the pleasure of listening to on audiobook.  Mr Power has a bestselling book called the “The Big Action.”  He thinks the key to winning in sales is to relentlessly take Big Action and just attack everything with huge force.  Instead of making 20 phone calls, you should make 120 phone calls.  Instead of setting up 3 meetings, you should set up 30 meetings.  You get the idea.  The Sales Director with the typo emails is a big fan of Max Power.

“The Big Action” has about 13 chapters.  The book could have most likely been 2 or 3 chapters but there is a good amount of fluff and repeating of the same things.

Don’t be a loser man.  In this world you need to win win win.  When somebody tells me No I can feel that they want to say Yes and then I press hard!  This world has got winners and losers and you need to pick who you want to be.  I want to be a winner.  I’m winning all the time baby!  My editor told me I should not say this but I am going to anyway, Get off your fat ass and take The Big Action!  People will try to stop you but don’t let them.  You are being a loser!  The Big Action is what you need!  Is this your job or is this a career?  How will you feed your family?  You need that Big Action baby!  -Max Power

The above transcript is how much of the book is.  As Dave looks around the table it is hard for him to tell if his fellow workers are listening to Max Power or if they are simply daydreaming while staring at the table.

After they finish the chapter, their manager is ready to do some motivation.  The manager says, “Okay team I hope we are ready to do The Big Action!  It is important to me that we hit our numbers.  My goal is that everyday, we are on top of the number boards.  You each have 500 prospects so I don’t see why each of you can’t be on top of that number board.  When I was in your position, one time I was sad because I thought I may get fired and then that motivated me to work to keep my job!  So I want you guys to know, if you don’t work hard then the Sales Director may fire you.”

Dave was having an internal monologue: “What is this bullshit?  I think I need to start hunting for a new job where I am not being informed that I could be fired everyday.  This is not healthy.”

The manager continued on.  The manager was talking about the numbers and how to go about calling the prospects.

The manager looked at Dave.  “Dave do you know what you need?”

Dave:  What is that?

Manager:  Focus.

The Manager continued, “you need to have focus.  I can tell that when you are about to make a sale that you get mega focused on what you are about to sell.  But what you really need to do is focus on all of the prospects.  Once you can focus on one hundred at a time then you will be successful.”  The manager said this with emphasis as if there was a communication of deep meaning.  Clearly the manager did not see the conflict between the idea of focus and “shotgun-strategy” (or Wide-Net approach).

Dave thought: “Oh okay I get it.  Instead of Focusing on one or two things, I need to focus on one hundred things.  Wow!  Makes perfect sense.”

The Manager continued to talk for a little bit.  “Okay team let’s go make some calls!”

As Dave got up to walk out the door he was thinking to himself, “My job hunt begins tonight.”

 

END OF ENTRY, DJ ROBO BISCUIT

UnNamed Dave Part 4 – Motivational Meeting

Dave was busy at work.

He was dialing his prospects.  He was emailing his prospects.  He was trying to gain information on what his customers were interested in purchasing.

He received an email on his company email from the Sales Director.  It was titled “Sales Motivation”

Let’s make today a great day and a very good day yes.  Let successs b your duty and your obligation and attack it like a lion eats the gassele n the fields of Africaa.  The only person who is holding you back is you and now is the time to unleash the beast of you.  Lets have massive activity and attack our goals with zest.  And who wants money?  You do.  DonT let fear hold you back from being great.

Reps with 1 Transaction this week:

Tina

Cortny

Jae

Zarra

Reps with Zero Transactions this week:

Bob

Dave 

-End of email.

 

Dave had read the email with a loathing feeling.  Every typo stung him as he had worked so hard in English class growing up but he knew that the Sales Director simply typed out his stream of consciousness email without proofreading it.  Dave was not sure if today would be a great day because he could feel the pressure of not making a sale yet.  He was confident his manager would be reminding him that he needed a sale.

His manager returned from the bathroom.  The manager needed about 45 seconds to login and read the email from the Sales Director.

“What do you have for me today Dave?”  The manager asked.

“I am trying to get in contact with this dude in South Africa and I have some interest from a client in India.”  Dave said.

“Sell it.” The manager said.

Dave knew the manager had no interest in the details of the client.  The manager simply wanted to see a transaction of 1000 USD or more pop up “on the board.”

Dave let out a sigh and continued his work.

-END OF ENTRY, DJ ROBO BISCUIT

UnNamed Dave Part 3 – The Big D

Dave picked up the phone to dial the client.  He was excited to offer the client the “Big Data” which he knew that sometimes clients liked.

RING RING RING

“Hello.”  The voice kind of mumbles.

Dave: Hello it is Dave with TechCombo.  How are you doing today?

Client takes a second to pause.  Then speaks softly, “I am doing fine how are you?”

Dave:  Great.  I am doing good.  What kind of projects have you been working on?

Client says, “Oh I work with database management.  I have been building a program that will allow me to sort the data and put it in groups.”

Dave: Oh okay.  So you are working with large amounts of data?

“Um not too large.  It is me and 2 other developers who are working on this.  We have been facing some bugs.”  The client says.

Dave:  Do you have an interest in our Big Data tool?

“Honestly, I am not sure.  I have not had much time to look at it.”  Said the client.

Dave:  Well, I think you could stretch out your client base with the Big Data.  When you are dealing with a massive girth of data you really need our TechCombo Big Data to handle that kind of thing.  Other organizations’ Big Data fail prematurely and you end up with a sticky mess of code.  The TechCombo Big Data can pound away like a champ!

“I am afraid those things you just said were too sexual for me.  Goodbye!”  CLICK.  The client hung the phone up.

Dave stood up and looked to his friend, Mark.  “Hey Mark, he just did not want the Big D.”

Mark:  Yeah well he is probably going to end up with a sticky mess of code.

 

END OF ENTRY, TechCombo,  DJ ROBO BISCUIT

 

UnNamed Dave January 25th

Dave wakes up and he gets in his car.  He wants to move quickyu; an he has already got n up and he plans on getting work quick.  He wants to be at work by 8am or earlier because he knows he will have to wrk 8 hours.

Dave’s work will be easier if he can be there before his manager shows up to work.  His manager hounds him with questions and demands.  Dave wants autonomy in his work.  He has many accounts to work and not much time.

 

He used to find meaning in his work at ComboTech he liked the idea that he was selling a useful product to software developers.   He thought he was doing consultative selling.  He wanted to align the needs of the clients he was selling to with what the product has to offer.  Ideally saving time and money for the developer.

However, the management of ComboTech does not care about the desires of the developer.  The only interest of ComboTech is to earn revenue and hit a certain goal by the end of the month.

Dave was okay with his job.  He was not the greatest rep within the organization but he was not the worse and he was usually able to achieve the expected metric by the end of the workday.

But something eerie was occurring at ComboTech.   The sales were drying up.   The customers were not purchasing as easily as they were before.   Reps could not sell anything to anybody.

One hole that ComboTech had was that they provide free versions to the whole planet so anyone could get the software of ComboTech for free.   The reps of ComboTech (like Dave) would need to contact these free downloaders and figure out if this person was one dude in his underwear sitting at home or if it was a skilled developer working for an organization.

 

A new strategy is being rolled out at ComboTech.  The Sales Director is scrambling because sales are not coming in.  He used to send out an email everyday that would inform the reps who did not have a sale and talk about such things as effort and laziness with no respect to things such as luck or maybe a sale falling through.  simply the assumption that the sales rep was a lazy rep who did not put in effort.    But, the email has changed.  It was about community and being in this together and working together BullPoop.

There was a shift from making a respectable number of calls of 50 to 60 phone calls.  That was the old expectation.  and the new goal was to make 90 calls a day or 100 calls a day.   “More Activity!”  If we just do more then we will sell more.     No respect for the idea that the organization is going to be pestering the customers and destroying the leads.  When you call one person 3 times a day and then call them the next time 3 times a day just blowing them up, that is only going to annoy and irritate people.   “Oh, they are ignoring us.”    “You reps are lazy.”  Thinks the Sales Director.    Where is the respect for human decency???       Who wants to be called 3 times a day and emailed 2 times a day for something they did not ask for???

Dave was not happy with his work.  His work became meaningless and he saw himself as somebody who was no longer a salesman but he was a Telemarketer.  Using his phone and email to bother and annoy and pester a person until a response was acquired.  That is not a way to gain the respect of anybody and will simply create a negative reputation within the world.

(To be continued)

-DJ ROBO BISCUIT

Christopher Eubanks Tall Lanky and Powerful

He lost to Radek Stepanek 62 62

This player is a beast.  Based on hours of watching footage I can say that Eubanks is a powerhouse!

It is amazing how you can watch the matches from the challenger tournaments and notice how good the players are.  How will they do on the main tour?

Noah Rubin has won main draw matches.  Rubin recently played Federer and held his own.

But there is big difference between winning points against pro players and winning entire matches!

And it is amazing to think that these players are 5 star or blue chip players who are the best in their state or college but on the pro tour they could be destroyed!

The margins in tennis are so slim.

Enjoy this match here and watch the shots at 8:35 and onward to see some NASTY forehands from Eubanks.

 

-DJ ROBO BISCUIT

Australian Open 2017 Stories and Upsets

Shelby Rogers from USA knocks out Simona Halep in the first round.  (big upset!)

Basically unknown player Alexander Bublik defeats Lucas Pouille in the first round (HUGE upset!)

Francis Tiafoe wins first round!  Great for Tiafoe as he came through qualifying!

Gilles Muller defeats Taylor Fritz in the first round.

M.Zverev defeats John Isner!

Lukas Lacko makes it into round 3.

Andreas Seppi defeats Nick Kyrgios in 5 sets!

Ivo Karlovic makes round 3!

an on fire and in-form Denis Istomin defeats Novak Djokovic!

Daniel Evans makes round 4 by defeating Bernard Tomic!

Ying-Ying Duan(China) makes a big run but loses to Venus Williams!

17 year old Jaimee Fourlis wins first round match!

Bacsinkzky knocks out Camila Giorgi in the first round.

Bouchard (Canada) has epic battle with Coco Candeweghe and Coco wins! #USA

Sorana Cirstea defeats Alison Riske and will know play Muguruza.

Daria Gavrilova keeps winning!  She now plays Karolina Pliskova, the number 5 seed.

 

There have been huge upsets!  On the Men’s side, it is massive that Istomin was able to defeat Djokovic.      Federer keeps on winning despite being the #17 seed.

Daniel Evans knocked out Cilic and Tomic.     Andreas Seppi is resurgent and beats Kyrgios.

and a big breakthrough for Jennifer Brady from America!

 

HURRAY!  Let’s go Australian Open 2017!