Tale: Fruit Center Support

( Imagine a Call center)

A man picks up the phone.

Service Desk Man:  Good Morning!  Thank you for calling fruit center support!  This is Phillip.  How May I help you today?

Customer: Hey Phillip!  I am using my banana here and my friend is telling me I need to get this converted over to an apple.  Can you guys do that for me?

Service Desk Man:  I’m sorry ma’am.  I am afraid that is not a feature.  We are not able to convert your banana into an apple.

Customer: Well why not?!  I want it to do this!  This is time sensitive too.  It is really important that I get this banana turned into an apple as quickly as possible!

Service Desk Man:  Are you sure that your friend was not talking about apple slices or maybe apple sauce?

Customer: Yes!  I am 100% sure!  I need this banana converted into an apple!

Service Desk Man: I’m sorry ma’am. But it is not designed to do that.  We can’t convert the banana into an apple for you.

Customer: Okay! Well then I need to speak to your manager.

(The customer gets sent over to the manager and the customer complains)

Service Desk Manager:  We are so sorry for all of the trouble ma’am.  We are going to create an escalation request for your need to convert this banana to an apple.   Someone from our team will reach out to you with the next steps.

( 4 days pass by )

ring ring ring!

Service Desk Man:  Fruit center support!  This is Phillip!

Customer:  It has been 4 days and I have not heard from anybody!  I really need your team to get this banana turned into an apple.

(The Service Desk Man reads over the notes of the Escalation ticket on his screen)

Service Desk Man: I am very sorry ma’am but based on the notes here on your escalation ticket I only have bad news.  Our team has come to the conclusion that there is no way to convert your banana into an apple.  The only workaround is to purchase an apple.

Customer (yelling):  This is crazy!  What do I even pay you guys for?!?!    (customer slams the phone down)

( Customer then sends an angry email to their fruit sales rep and the fruit sales rep apologized profusely and waved the cost of their fruit.)

END OF STORY

 

(This story is based on true events)

Feel free to share with your friends, especially any of the ones who work in call centers!

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DJRoboBiscuit

Expert on Life (Movies, Books, Television, Gaming, Tennis). Aspiring Novelist and Philosopher. Big Fan of Satire and Parody.

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